Empowered by Information

Since my confusing ob/gyn appointment where my doctor seemed to be trying to scare me out of a VBA2C (not pregnant, just planning) I have been scouring the internet for information. Not just positive vbac blogs and stories of VBA2C (successful & not) but also medical studies and ACOG guidelines. And I am feeling very much empowered by what I have found.

According to ACOG guidelines as a mother with 2 low transverse scar caesarians I am still a very good candidate for Trial of Labor After Caesarian (TOLAC). Especially since we want to plan for more than one more child. I feel empowered. I know I can bring this information to my OB/GYN when we have conceived and make my case as an informed and empowered woman who knows my strengths and my rights.

I am slowly making a list of things that I want (and don't want) for my next pregnancy and birth. I am backing up my choices with literature and case studies for most of my reasons. Let's face it, some of it comes down to personal preference and some women are more comfortable with certain things than others. I feel like I'm back in school doing an independent study course, and I plan to ace my final project.

Removed but Confused

I did it. I took control. I had my birth control implant removed yesterday. I should be happy, ecstatic, elated. Instead I'm feeling confused & just a bit conflicted.

I asked my gyno about VBA2C. "It's your choice of course. But.." and he starts describing uterine rupture and the damage it could do to a baby if I were to rupture and not get to a OR fast enough. When asked he gave me the statistics on rupture. There's an approximate 1% chance of uterine rupture after 2 C-sections. From my research I know that can be increased if I "need" to be induced. (Not if I have any say!) 99% chance that I would not rupture. 99%. I feel like he was trying to scare me. Why? His numbers? The inconvenience of waiting on baby? Insurance policy & rates? But I'm still struggling to advocate for myself and hearing him be seemingly against giving me a chance really made me question everything for a bit.

Today I'm stronger. Still a little confused. It's been 8 years since my last section. And I am still determined to make sure it is really the last. I will prepare my body for vaginal birth, before we even conceive. I will prepare myself throughout the pregnancy. I will have a VBA2C.